What is the most useful investment you have ever made in your life?

Seriously. Just take a second or two to examine what comes to your mind when I ask you this question before reading on.

Sometimes I get the privilege of being in the presence of a wise man or woman. When that happens, I will often try to pick their brains in the hope that I might benefit from the encounter. Yesterday was one of those days. While having idle conversation with one wise man, I sneaked in the question about the most useful investment he had ever made.

The man did not have to think twice before he answered. These were his exact words: ‘I would say my children. After all, that is the only thing that goes on, isn’t it?’

This came from a man who has invested in his education to university doctorate level. The same man has paid the price of spending 8 years of his life in a prison for the sake of what he believed in. In that time, he was held in solitary confinement. I am sure there are many more things that would awe me if I knew him for a longer period.

I do not know whether I should be ashamed of myself for saying this, but I will. I never considered children as the most useful investment in my life. OK, I’ve said it! You?

Lead them responsibly!

They might not belong to you. Still, do not just watch them go down the drain. Do something! Photographer!

I guess I should not be the only one to be ashamed today. Damn paparazzi!

I was just sitting idly in the office when I noticed some wooden carvings I had never really looked at before. The most outstanding one is of a man with a big stomach, swollen face and thick lips. A pretty ugly thing I tell you!

I was thinking that maybe the unhappy look of the wooden gentleman might be because he has been relegated into being something he does not like? I am sure he would love to be wearing more than just a sack loincloth. This one does not offer much protection from armchair explorers who obviously would want to peek and see what is underneath it!

How often do you find yourself with a well know internal frown that prolongs eternally? You know it is there because you have given someone else the switch to your happiness. Now we are on, then off, on, then off! Maybe that person will eventually squeeze the joy of living from inside you. End up making you become something you were never meant to be – one whose dreams poofed! into thin air.

With time, the negative energy builds up and becomes too much to contain. It explodes, staining others with such generous patches of bitterness that they wonder what they did to deserve it! They knew there was something wrong but damn! Did all that come from inside there?

Sometimes it is good to voice your feeling for whatever the effort is worth. Apart from making you feel less like a doormat, you might pleasantly surprise yourself. That person who you think is most unlikely to listen, might reward your guts with a humbled ear.

There is never a good time to start the process of breaking loose from those chains that have bound you helplessly for so long. There is only now.

Alternatively, you can just sit there corroding your insides with the poisonous thoughts about the barber who keeps giving you a bad haircut!

Tom and Jerry is one of the most successful and popular animated cartoons ever made. The first Tom and Jerry series was made in 1939 and the last in the late 1970s. Tom is a cat and Jerry is a mouse. The plot usually consists of Tom’s frustrated attempts to eat Jerry, and the mayhem and destruction that ensue.

I’ve always wondered why Tom never considered changing his diet. Wouldn’t that have saved him 30 years of misery? He might even have ended up beeing a respectable cartoon character like Batman!

But on the other hand, who am I to judge Tom? In life, we always find ourselves totally absorbed in chasing petty things that never satisfy us – if we catch them at all. These sideshows do us injustice by taking our focus away from what is important. In fact, they leave us greedier for more of the same mediocrity.

At one point, you might find yourself losing the value of a great friendship at the expense of proving your point. Unfortunately, when we hurt other people, not many of us have the humility to return to the scene of the accident – often leaving the relationship to bleed to death. Those of us who return are often late – resulting in expensive fixes that never fully restore.

What I am trying to say is that I know I hurt you. And I apologize sincerely.

I happen to be one of those people who do their packing in the last moment before traveling. As a result, the packing is often hurried and panicky with a lot of swearing that it will never happen again. As if I am out to enjoy both extremes, I unpack the same luggage veeery slowwwly. You will then understand when I tell you that I found some Kenyan currency in my traveling bag yesterday as I continue unpacking one month after being here in Somaliland.

My mind jumped back home in Nairobi, and I found myself crossing off items from an imaginary list of the things that could benefit from the few thousand shillings. Then as I put the money aside sadly, I marveled at how something can be so valuable in one place and be worthless in another.

Of all the things that I clasp so tightly to my chest today, what is still going to be worth holding on to in another phase of my life?

This morning, I stood in my favorite spot outside my house in Hargeisa. From here, the eye can trace the capital city of Somaliland as it flows down the valley and up again to the opposite hills. After the rain that fell yesterday, the view is similar to the one a small insect will see when standing at the rim of a bowl of vegetable salad – cool and fresh.

On a normal morning, the ingredients for an agitated day start building soon after sunrise. You can literally see the heat, dust and noise returning after the night’s reprieve. In your mind’s eye these accumulated elements descend on the sprawling city like a tattered silk ribbon falling from the sky. This rough-hewn beauty can only be compared to the classic ragged landscape scenes immortalized in old cowboy movies.

Around me are ruins of houses with missing roofs and walls suffering from old bullet wounds. It is obvious that a bomb fell just a few yards from where I stand. This devastation happened slightly over a decade ago. This is when troops loyal to Siad Barre the former Somalia dictator brought war into Hargeisa.

Just as outstanding are the reconstruction efforts of this city beloved to the people of Somaliland.

I do not know what your opinion is about the on going war in Iraq. To be fair to you, I will not bombard you with my opinion. However, I will ask you to take a moment to beg God to give a favorable fate to 2 of my fellow Kenyans who are currently being held captive in Iraq. Pray also for the numerous families whose world war has come too soon. I am sure all of them need a living father, husband, brother, son and friend – not a dead hero in a flag draped casket.

After being in Somaliland for a while, I often wonder if talking loudly is a habit that might be acquired in an attempt to be heard above the loud battle sounds in the head? Terror rarely talked about but relived often? My wish today is for war to stay away from your and my doorsteps forever.

Amen.

I am coming to the end of my weekend. The Somaliland weekend is on Friday, remember? This is the day of the week that the cook in my house takes her well earned vacation. It is also when I watch my diet and fast and do any other activity associated with not eating. Of course these are my excuses to avoid cooking.

I have just come from boiling some water for my dinner – coffee. Today’s lack of activity in the kitchen had enabled a troop of ants to work their way up the gas cooker. I found them in the process of carrying some morsels of food to wherever their home is. I absent-mindedly lit the burner and in that split second, I orphaned and widowed many ants expectantly waiting for their breadwinners to return home. The rest of the poor ants abandoned their load of food, broke formation and scattered in all directions.

It did not make me feel good at all. I pictured myself in search of food in the land of the friendly dragons. I saw a dragon accidentally saying ‘Hello! How are you doing?’, instead of just nodding a greeting as expected. My resulting soot covered, naked, hairless, barbeque smelling self was not a pretty sight.

I hope the caretaker of all living things will forgive me. I would not want Him to avenge the ants by punishing me and the people in my hometown. Since the town is near the equator, I would imagine that he might split open the world in the middle just for a moment. I can see men, women, children and their domesticated animals falling down the abyss! Ahhhhhh!……..(as the ground swallows us)…… Ssszzzzzzz!……..(getting fried as we fall past the hot core of the earth)……. Ahhhhhhhh!……….(as we continue falling )………. Dooffffffff!….. (as we land at the bottom of the ocean on the other side of the globe). I think we would have to swim back home from the ocean between Japan and the US. Man! Would they all be pissed at me!

To make sure that all is not lost, I should take a moment to remind myself of the ant lesson found in the bible. Maybe I will want to cook next weekend?

Proverbs chapter 6: Verses 6 – 11

Go to the ant, thou sluggard! Consider her ways and be wise, Which having no captain, overseer, or ruler, Provides her supplies in the summer, and gathers her food in the harvest. How long will you slumber, O sluggard? When will you rise from your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to sleep – So shall your poverty come on you like a prowler, and your need like an armed man.

Look carefully at this clever painting on the ground. The 2 men falling down a tunnel – they look so real! The man in the picture looks real?

Let’s talk briefly about how our minds work. Basically your mind is a ‘pattern recognition system.’ It’s very efficient at this process and we couldn’t function the way we do as human beings if our minds didn’t have it. If we had to analyze every detailed piece of information before we took any action, we would have a hard time tying our shoes.

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm.Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig turth!

This is your ‘pattern recognition system’ at work.

On a totally different note, if something does not work, you might want to try using a different approach. Think of the people you work with. You must have someone in mind who would benefit if they tried doing something differently. Maybe pushing their spectacles a bit higher up the bridge of their noses might help their looks? Or if they spend as much time on work as on complaining, they might actually get that promotion they go on and on and on about? What about that fellow who has to tickle his brain for inspiration whenever he talks to people by sticking his finger up his nose! Come on – educate them! This could be your day of doing another person a good turn. Don’t worry if it does not happen today. It most certainly will happen when that person pisses you off. You will scream it all out in the presence of other people. But at that time, it will make you feel soooo bad!

We can start right here by telling this man that this is definitely not a good way to present a proposal for research funding!

I just watched the second movie in the Matrix trilogy titled ‘Matrix Reloaded’. The story of the Matrix is set in a fictitious world of the future where machines have taken over man’s world. The machines have turned to using human beings as a source of energy required to power them. The humans are plugged into mechanical systems more or less like you plug a dry cell into a flashlight!

To make the humans content to oblige in their thankless role, the machines create a virtual world called Matrix. The Matrix is achieved by using computer programs that create a ‘world’ similar to the one we live in today. However, it is a simulation that only exists in the minds of the humans. The reality is a pathetic picture of naked men and women embedded in womb like conditions, with tubes and cables to support life and extract the much needed energy.

The movie revolves around the lives of a band of human soldiers that are launching a revolt to reverse the situation. They hide underground in caves from where they engage the enemy in guerilla attacks.

I remember a particular scene where an old wise man talks to a young man called Neo. The talk takes place as Neo and the old man are walking through their habitat’s machine room. This is the room where among other things water and air are purified and pumped into the caves to make it possible to live underground. The old man points out the irony of the dependence of the soldiers on the same machines they are fighting.

Can you imagine your apprehension if you could not control the clothes you are wearing? What if your skirt decided to lift itself just as you are walking into the office? Would you dare to ever completely trust clothes?

We are always very afraid of losing control of anything we have power over. We love to be able to use and manipulate at will. Gadgets, colleagues, work, animals – everything we encounter. What is being powerless? Right now I can only imagine the feeling I might have if I was placed in the cockpit of a space shuttle and was required to fly it in order to save my own life.

As we seek to control everything we can, we neglect the one most important thing of them all. Ourselves. I am sure that if I was able to have total control of myself, I would easily be able to determine which level of control is adequate for me in every situation. No more feeling like I am losing my ‘freedom’, and no more playing small god either.

In the movie, the machines control the humans. The humans are seeking to reverse the situation to where the humans control the machines. Who is right and who is wrong? Is there a middle ground?

I hope to find out when I watch the last installment of Matrix.

—————–
The One

The crusade to free the humans from the machines in Matrix is headed by one man called Mopheus. Mopheus’s zeal is fired by a prophecy that a man would come who would be ‘the one’. Mopheus undertakes the task of finding and recruiting this man whose name is Neo.

Mopheus and those who believe in the prophecy fight beside Neo against insurmountable odds in the face of the enemy. If we ever lose hope, I believe we will easily find it in this movie.

At the end of Matrix Reloaded, all hope seems lost as Neo declares that he had come across a devastating truth. That he might not be ‘the one’ after all. The look on the faces of the believers is one of the last thing that I saw before the ‘to be continued’ sign came at the end of the movie.

It is a big honor being a ‘the one’ to another person. As you might have discovered, few people qualify for the role. This title is earned through faith, trust, honesty and respect. Your responsibility is never to desecrate these sacred pillars. They are very difficult to rebuild.

I received this email from a friend. It just made my day! Read on…

I was barely sitting down when I heard a voice from the other stall saying: “Hi, how are you?”

I’m not the type to start a conversation in the men’s restroom but I don’t know what got into me, so I answered, somewhat embarrassed, “Doin’ just fine!”

And the other guy says: “So what are you up to?”

What kind of question is that? At that point, I’m thinking this is too bizarre so I say: “Uhhh, I’m like you, just traveling!”

At this point I am just trying to get out as fast as I can when I hear another question. “Can I come over?”

Ok, this question is just too weird for me but I figured I could just be polite and end the conversation. I tell him, “No……..I’m a little busy right now!!!”

Then I hear the guy say nervously…

“Listen, I’ll have to call you back. There’s an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!!!”

Do you ever have those restless days that you become illiterate as far as your job is concerned? By evening you only have a piece of paper that you doodled on to show for a day’s work. And even what you accomplished is an insult to doodles!

These are the days that you can feel the small red devil inside you slowly awakening from its lazy slumber. Its pointed tail begins to wriggle in anticipation, as it recognizes the weakness resulting from lack of your usual dose of work. As part of its grooming, it attempts to sharpen its horns by rubbing them against your already sore nerves.

You most certainly will be writing notes of apology to a loved one in the next few days. Reason? Emotions ran out of hand. Or maybe you will be feeling disgusted with yourself for what happened before the night came to an end. Reason? Emotions ran out of both hands. Have you realized that regrets rarely come on the following day? – That day is reserved for feeling numb.

You might want to keep a few friendly demons dancing around your shoulders; just to distract the small red one with their gimmicks. But then again, what is penance for?

It is good to know that someone can see them.